Today, I wanted to touch on the topic of NATURAL HAIR. I've been natural for almost 3 years and it has been a journey so to say. I have had days where I loved what I was doing and also days that I had no idea what I signed myself up for; today is one of those days.
My hair and the process of being natural is causing me to grow weary. I'm constantly fighting with my roots and disputing with my ends. I feel like my texture and curl pattern is trying to hit me with a K.O. I want to say that I've been winning this battle but I really don't think that would be the most honest statement to make.
If you don't know me personally, I'm the type of person that loves to change up my look. I love to do my do and show off my hair as an accessory. This is the reason that I know dreading or having my hair consistently braided wouldn't work. I'm not ready for that type of commitment. But the fact that I like to be versatile with my looks is beginning to have me to reconsider the "creamy crack."
I know the damage that perms or relaxers do to the hair as well as my body, this is the reason I went natural to begin with, but I wonder if wearing hair in it's natural state is for everyone... I want to say of course it is because this is the way G*d created us, we or shall I say I, wasn't born with relaxed hair. My natural hair isn't relaxed, it's more uptight and difficult if anything (which is probably why it chooses to fight me the way it does.) Nevertheless, this hair is a part of me and it's challenging me to return to true essence.
At the point where I am now, I seriously considering the big chop again. I did my first BC October 2009 after transitioning for a few months prior. I know how dreadful of a time that was because the level of one's creativity can only be stretched but so far when your hair is only an inch long. I'm allowing this idea to take place again because I feel as if I'm growing a field of weeds. Starting fresh may allow me to fall in love again with being NAPTURALLY ME. It will give me another opportunity to remove the damage that has set in and fully nurture my kinks again.
My goal when starting on this path was to obtain healthy, full, natural hair. In the last few months with me turning 30, I've noticed changes in myself physically that has pushed my goal slightly further away. To me, my hair looks dull in color and although it's thick, it's not presenting the fullness I know it can achieve.
I do suggest that if you have been playing with the notion of going natural that you do your research beforehand. Talk to others that you know have made this decision, heck, if you live in the Atlanta area I'm sure you can find someone because I've noticed lots of women are taking part in this epidemic. Find what's comfortable for you and don't choose to go this route because of the looks of someone else. None of us have the same exact hair texture, for me, I have two different types. I say this because one, we aren't to covet what our neighbor has but for two, you will become steadily unhappy because you expect your hair to look like that of another.
I wish you the best of luck if you are reading this prior to your decision and I say stay strong to those like me that are asking themselves the questions that I have regarding their already made decision. Like anything else, there will be good days and bad days, or in our case, good hair days and bad hair days. For you ladies, below is one of my recent paintings done to encourage you with words of advice. I call her 'PICK IT UP and PICK IT OUT.'
Peace family.
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