In the garden

The LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being. Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed. The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man."
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened.
Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"
The man said, "The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."
Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?"
To the woman he said, "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."
To Adam he said, "Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, 'You must not eat of it,' "Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return."

Adam named his wife Eve, because she would become the mother of all the living.

And the LORD God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever." So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life.

This was the account of Adam and Eve, a story of which many of us know. I have heard many different opinions on why this particular story was included in the Bible, I have also heard quite a few different perspectives on the main characters involved.
But today, I asked myself what else happened to this lovely couple after God gave them their individual consequences. I imagined what their home life must have looked like and the conversations they held after the "fall of man."

It is written that God gave Adam/man authority to name all living creatures, so I pondered on what else he may have called his wife when he thought of their banishment.
Before Adam began his painful toil (which he had to endure for all the days of his life), he showed compassion and gave his wife the name Eve, which meant LIFE. It is shown that he had forgiven her error. Eve made a terrible mistake that day in the garden, yet, he still seen her as mother, as fruitful, as his soul mate and more importantly, as worthy. She was still an extension of God and himself.

Yet and still, I could not help but to think that Adam was possibly putting up a front because at that instance he knew he was still before God. I mean, upon consuming the fruit they both instantly gained knowledge of good and evil, their nakedness had become apparent and their flaws were made visible. So I wonder if throughout the days, months and years, did Adam begin to see his once perfect helper as a foe? *Remember, he tried selling her out once when he was asked about what happened.*
This question sparks great interest in me because nowadays, men speak to their women anyway they chose and or feel. They are no longer naming us LIFE, but giving us labels that resemble DEATH. They are marking us women by their own misery. The sad thing is, is that we allow them to give us these new titles. Somewhere along the line it became acceptable for men to take back their rib and instead give us their middle finger (and we all know what that means.)

So I say to my new age Adam's of the world: That woman that you injure with your words is to be respected. Women are allowed to make mistakes, just as all human beings, it is a part of her learning God, herself and her world. Give your woman grace and forgiveness all the time because you are forever amongst the Creator and He did not give you this authority to abuse it. Your woman was not taken from your feet, to be under you, nor was she taken from your head, to be above you. She was taken from your side, to stand beside you and be held close to protect your heart and support you, as God intented for her to do. Treat her well, love her and respect her, for she is fragile. In hurting her, you hurt God. What you do to her, you do to Him. In crushing her, you only damage your own heart, the heart of your Father and the heart of her Father.

To my Eve's: Continue to live fervently for God. You were created so that everything God wanted to share with your man may be experienced through you. God knows that it is not good for man to be alone, despite how much your man may say or think he does not need you. You were fashioned in God's holiness, strength, purity, love, protection and support. You are special because of that alone. You were created perfectly and beautifully. Your Father gave you the characteristics of the rib, which are strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most vital organ in a man; his heart. His heart is the center of his being and his lungs hold the breath of life. You as the rib cage will allow yourself to be broken before you will allow any damage to the heart. But this means that you own your own virtue and not accept the names of destruction that are casted upon you. You are life and through you all of life is brought into existense.

In the garden, man was created to bring glory to God and woman was to bring glory to her man. Together you represent the totality of God. You took a fall once in the garden. This time around help each other to stand.

Are you happy?

Well, are ya? Are you HAPPY?

Recently, I have asked a number of people this simple three word question and the answers I got back raised an eyebrow.
I noticed that this question did not bear an easy one word reply of "yes" or "no" to which I was seeking to hear. Instead the answers unfolded fears, doubts and many explanations. It was almost as if the subjects thought I was being too personal or as if I were attempting to offend them.

To further understand why I could not receive a one word reply to this question, I followed it up with asking, "What is your definition of happiness?" Not to my surprise, I again received many different responses.

Here were a few of the more common definitions given:
"Happiness is a state of mind, I could choose to be happy or choose to be sad."
"Happiness is a feeling."
"Happiness is something that is not real."
"Happiness is something you have to pursue, ie. The Pursuit of Happiness."

Again, these responses were being spewed as defense mechanisms. This reaction helped me to see why it was so difficult for these people to answer if they were happy or not, (in yes or no terms.)

I then turned the question onto myself,(as did one of the subjects asked) and my answer varied. I found that when I asked myself this question, I answered boldly with confidence. I had a one word answer, sweet and simple. Yet, when my subject asked, I had to give reason for the same answer that I gave to myself just moments before. It was as though I felt the urge to soften up my reply by giving specifics. As the day continued on, I honestly wanted to go back and tell the person who asked if I were happy to pretend as though they did not get the answer that I had given.

So what happened?
1. I became afraid that this person would be offended by my response. I did not want my happiness or unhappiness to unconsciously affect theirs.
2. I did not want to be misunderstood or judged by my answer.
3. I felt as though I had to protect my state of mind, my feeling (which is real to me) and my long pursuit of.

I believe that the many people I asked fell into one of these three above categories. We have learned from our past experiences that happiness is a temporary thing, so we best hold onto it tightly when it passes us by. But now it is up to us to unlearn the belief that tells us happiness is temporary or that if we do feel too much happiness; doom is lurking around the corner to steal it away and bring balance to us and the universe. That is a lie, so please do not believe it.

Counter react to the above categories.
1. Know that we are all responsible for our own happiness. My happiness or lack of can not change your state of happiness or unhappiness, and vice versa.
2. Your answer whether it be a yes or a no, is not a matter of being right or wrong. There is no one grading your response, so be honest with yourself and others.
3. Know that your happiness is already yours, it lives in your heart (the inside) and is shown through your actions (the outside), therefore it is already guarded and kept safe.

Your happiness is sacred, so I encourage you to become more like the psalmist and speak this prayer to yourself and the Lord everyday.

He says to himself, "Nothing will shake me; I'll always be happy and never have trouble." -Psalm 10:6

Now the next time that I or someone else asks you the simple question of whether you are happy or not, you can reply confidently with a YES or NO and know exactly why.